Did you know that dinosaurs were quite large? Some as big as a bus. That's large.
If I was a god, I'd think dinosaurs were an eternal source of amusement. Huge, lumbering beasts wandering about the land, trampling on bushes and smaller creatures. Quite humourous! Imagine paleolithic people coming across dinosaur skeletons. They'd be scared witless, thinking up tales of long ago when giant beasts roamed the Earth eating their ancestors and laying waste to whole tribes. Then, after several millenia of these stumbling, demented child-kings fighting over such useless things as land ownership and control, they rediscover interesting fossils of creatures that lived eons before. In no time at all a new branch of scientific research is created and theories are put forward giving scant regard to the facts underlying them. The belief is well-founded according to these scientists and their logical argument:- these are fossils of skeletons, skeletons are an essential part of many living beings, therefore, these fossils were once living, breathing creatures. All very well and good aside from the one fatal flaw in their hypotheses....the dinosaurs never existed. This is a cruel universe. In the realm of the Gods, April Fools Day lasts for millions of years of Earth time. It's almost midday, the joke will soon be over and we shall discover that we were led blindly into believing that dinosaurs were more than a deific joke. Well, come on. If you were a God, you couldn't just say, "sacrifice this, sacrifice that, eat this on such and such a day and not on other days. This is my only begotten son, please treat him nicely. Do this, don't do that. Don't covet your neighbours ass! Blessed be the cheese-makers", you'd go stir crazy. It would be like watching David Letterman 24/7. Limited interest and nil intellectual value. That's where dinosaurs and a plethora of so called anomalies (the paranormal and supernatural) come into play. We play Monopoly for our own amusement, not for that of the dog, spinning wheel, top hat and race car. Do we consider the pawns as we send them out first in a game of chess? NO!!! We consider our strategy and play accordingly.
The Gods have been playing us like fools. Well, I've had enough. No more!!! I DON'T believe in dinosaurs. The Great Flood wasn't to relieve the Earth of evil-doers, it was to relieve the Gods of boredom. The Gods cannot be beneficent. Who, with any divine powers, would allow Richard Simmons to reach the heights he did. Did they sleep through the Dark Ages and let the church come to power? Big mistake. The established, orthodox church has done them more damage than they could possibly do to us. If we are alone in the universe, the only "intelligent" beings then that is the cruelest joke of all. They have made for us an unbelievable expanse of blackness which we may one day learn to traverse, only to find out that it is just us, nobody else. Talk about poor use of space.
As with people there are the good and the bad (not-so-good) at the summit of Olympus. The Greeks knew this, as did the Egyptians and the Persians and Babylonians. Why have we forgotten this basic fact? Why have billions put their lives and deaths in the corrupted hands of one war-mongering, jealous, hate-filled demi-god? Prime real-estate. That's the answer. Thousands of thousands of parcels of land won in a bet over whether or not the dinosaur thing would be a good value source of amusement. God hedged his bets and brought home the grand prize, including the right to proclaim himself lord of all. Well, he ain't lord of the rings, and he ain't lord of the flies, so in my book that doesn't make a terribly promising companion for the here-after.
So, we'll see how all of this will pan out yet. The day of judgement will soon be upon us. Yes, who will win Big Brother this year? The Gods don't care, they're just waiting to show the latest card up thir sleeve. Aliens. One day, the whole world will see an alien land upon our planet and as he raises his right hand and proclaims "I come in peace", the Gods will be rolling about in fits of riotous laughter and really, who can blame them?
2 comments:
When an alien lands on earth, we will do one of three things: (a) blow it up (b) kill it carefully and dissect it to see what makes it ticks, or (c) put it in a cage to show it off and also to show our superiority. Who says God doesn't have a sense of humour when He made huoffspringity? (see the other site for an explanation of this!)
Yes, I agree with your assertions. Huoffspringity would definately try to destroy the alien in some way. That is, unless the alien catches us in his Zippeedeedoodah laser pulse slicey/dicey canon thingy. In which case, we would all die. Peace-loving alien-kind would have great difficulty in acheiving any sort of open-air howdy-do without being fired upon. (Read Fred Pohl's 'Homegoing' to find out how they may do this- don't mind the ending though; peace-loving can mean so many things).
I also agree that people complain to much about a great many things. I, of course, am no exception. What I cannot stand is people who complain and expect others to listen to their whining. I complain for the sake of complaining. It keeps me amused, especially if I complain about things that really don't need to be complained about. Like llamas. Big deal, they spit. Sure it can be a little off-putting but what's complaining going to do? It's going to irritate many, many more llamas equally capable of spitting and then we're in big trouble!
God certainly would have to have a sense of humour. I recall several chapters of the Old Testament. There was an awful lot of begatting going on and God would've been giggling away like a little boy teasing goldfish.
And I am going to contact the editors of the OED (Oxford English Dictionary- for those who thought it was net-speak) and tell them that huoffspringity should be included in the next edition or the next addendum!
And, here be the other site of which we speak...:)
http://www.angelfire.com/un/i_am_the_damned/
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